Today's OneWord

This 60 second write took an interesting and unexpected twist after the first sentence. I thought I was going to write a fictional thing...not so. As usual, the stuff in the parenthesis came after the clock stopped.

The chosen one - the favorite. With my grandma, I have always felt like that. She has always been the most patient, the most forgiving with me. Recently she has entered an assisted living place and I feel as though she is drifting out of this world. I am losing the one (grandparent I have who I feel really knows me. Who I feel I really know. She has been seeming older for some time now, but it was just in the last couple of years that she has seemed to give up. The feisty old lady that I have always claimed to get my bravery from is getting tired. Tired of the arthritis, tired of the frailty, tired of being alone. A couple of weeks ago, she admitted to herself and us that she no longer felt safe at home alone. She gave up her beloved independence. Since then, she has handed much of the responsibility of her life over to my mother and the nurses in her complex. It is as if she is saying, "If I have to give up this much, I might as well give up everything.")

Work It

Tomorrow, Mikey and I are going to try out a nearby gym. I had a whole post written about how cool it seemed, but Blogger ate it. So suffice it to say that you get a 30 minute work-out, rotating between 50 machine that alternate between weight training and cardo work. The lady there seemed very nice and when she took our measurements, she made me feel better about myself, rather than worse. I am looking forward to toning up a bit, dropping a couple of pounds and utilizing those stress relieving endorphines! I'll report back after our trial run.

a haiku for blogger

yet another post
in the great cyber-beyond
drifting aimlessly

Read-A-Thon

My school is having a read-a-thon for the next month. Since the first two weeks coincide with my break, I have decided to participate. I told my kids that I was going to take part for the first two weeks (once school starts up again, I won't be reading much), and I challenged them to try to read more than me. They get the full four weeks to read, of course. They all know that I am an avid reader and that I plan to read for my whole vacation.

I saw one of my students in the grocery store the other day and she asked me how many pages I had read. When I told her I was up to about 160, she laughed and said "I'm beating you! I've read 200!" Her mom scolded her for being rude, but I told her I was thrilled she was taking my challenge seriously. After five days of reading, I am already up to 652 pages, and that was only reading in-between outings with my father. My goal is to reach 2,000 pages or more.

Being that it is a read-a-thon to raise money for our school library, there is more to it than just reading. I also challenged the students to raise more money than I can. (This is the part I am no good at!) Sponsors can pledge either a flat rate, or add some extra motivation and make it per page.

Hamumu Software is sponsoring me for $15.00. If there is anyone else out there who would care to make a pledge, leave a comment or drop me an e-mail and I will give you more information. (All pledges must be paid by April 23.) Every penny will go to improving our elementary school library!

But even more importantly, you will be helping me save my reputation. I talked a lot of smack on the last day of school. And I owe everyone who reads more pages or raises more money a special treat. You gotta help me out!!

Adios

This morning I sent my father on his way with a thermos of coffee, lots of hugs, and a couple "drive carefully"s. I even did the midwestern thing and stood in my yard, waving as he started up his vehicle and drove out of sight. It will be nice to have my house back to normal, and the cats are looking much more relaxed already (little emotional barometers, they are!), but I am sad to have this visit come to an end. I can't say I like entertaining, but I sure do like spending time with family. He has a long drive ahead of him, so wish him clear skies, easy traffic and good radio stations.

Ahem.

Can I just ask one small favor? Just a tiny, little thing that would make my life much easier...

Can you PLEASE stop acting surprised when you find out that I am, indeed, still a vegetarian? Could you please, please, keep in mind that I am, in fact, an adult and capable of making my own life decisions that deserve to be respected, if not understood and embraced? I thought long and hard before becoming a vegetarian and I have strong reasons for it. It is not something I entered into on a lark. So, when you see me next, just go ahead and assume that I am still avoiding meat, unless I say otherwise.

And while you are at it, you can stop pointing out every single vegetarian dish on the menu. I don't point out everything with meat in it to you, do I?

Thanks. And have a nice night.

Fine Sailing

"There is nothing--absolutely nothing, half so much worth doing as simply messing about in boats." ~The Wind in the Willows

Today was simply wonderful. We took the boat out in San Diego Bay and I got to smell the salt water, watch the sea lions, and feel the spray on my face and wind in my hair. Delightful.

Oh, Please!

This is getting too silly.

Sleeping In and Eating Out

With my father here, we have been eating out a lot. I am not far enough into my vacation to be ready for the work involved in home cooking. We even went out for breakfast this morning and gorged ourselves on pancakes, crepes and waffles. Yum. Then we wandered around the bead store, picked up my ring - all fixed - from the jeweler's, and picked through used cds at the music place. Now I am ready for a nap. Because people nap while on vacation!

WHOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!!

Can you say

VACATION

??

Useless Quiz 2

My HTML color...

you are darkviolet #9400D3

Your dominant hues are blue and magenta. You're the one who goes to all the parties but doesn't quite fit in at every one... you know what you want, but are afraid of what the world might think of it. You're a little different and that's okay with them, and if you're smart it's okay with you too. Your saturation level is very high - you are all about getting things done. The world may think you work too hard but you have a lot to show for it, and it keeps you going. You shouldn't be afraid to lead people, because if you're doing it, it'll be done right. Your outlook on life is brighter than most people's. You like the idea of influencing things for the better and find hope in situations where others might give up. You're not exactly a bouncy sunshine but things in your world generally look up.

the spacefem.com html color quiz

Mikey's HTML color...

you are mediumauqamarine #66CDAA

Your dominant hues are cyan and green. Although you definately strive to be logical you care about people and know there's a time and place for thinking emotionally. Your head rules most things but your heart rules others, and getting them to meet in the middle takes a lot of your energy some days. Your saturation level is medium - You're not the most decisive go-getter, but you can get a job done when it's required of you. You probably don't think the world can change for you and don't want to spend too much effort trying to force it. Your outlook on life is brighter than most people's. You like the idea of influencing things for the better and find hope in situations where others might give up. You're not exactly a bouncy sunshine but things in your world generally look up.

the spacefem.com html color quiz

Useless Quiz

with an invisible brain, of course.

Shaken, not Stirred

This morning I got the shakes. My muscles trembled as though I were standing in the freezing cold without proper attire or making a speech in front of important strangers. I was doing neither. In fact, I can think of no good reason for this shaking and it worries me a little. It may have been that I was hungry (I felt better after eating lunch), but I did eat a good breakfast. Hmm. I guess I will have to eat more eggs and peanut butter for a while to make sure I am getting enough protein. Otherwise, I will bring it up at my Drs. appointment on Monday.

Warm Fuzzies

I was invited by one of my students to watch her tae kwon do class tonight. She won first place at a tournament last weekend and tonight she received her yellow belt, first class. Since I was unable to go to Riverside to see her competition, she asked if I could watch her award ceremony.

I have to admit that my initial (internal) reaction to the invitation was dismay. When I am done with a day of struggling to get my students to learn and work and play nicely, the only thing I want to do is head home, eat dinner and veg out. I rarely leave my house after 5:30pm during the week. Even grocery shopping waits until the weekend.

However, the thought of disappointing this little girl was too much to bear. She is one of the few in the class who still gives me hugs. She tries hard every single day and I can see the determination in her eyes. She has had a particularly difficult time lately, because her father is serving a 14 month stint in Iraq. I couldn't refuse.

I am so glad that I went. It did me good to see her eyes light up when she noticed me. We snuck in during the class right before hers and sat on the sidelines. When she saw me, she gave a HUGE wave, hollered to her mom "Mommy! Mrs. H is here!", and ran over to show me her trophy. All during her class, as she received her new belt, listened to her instructor, and broke a board with her fist (!!!), she kept looking my way to make sure I was still there. Still watching. Still enjoying the performance.

And I was.

Nature or Nurture?

In the course of my blog-surfing tonight I found this interesting post over at Daddy, Papa and Me. Check it out.

Growing Up

I am a fourth grade teacher. My students are 9 and 10 years old. They are kids. Young people. That is why it was so shocking to find out that one of my girls got her period today. Her body is declaring itself physically capable of reproduction. She is NINE YEARS OLD.

Um

Actual conversation I had this week...
(please note: When I need a chance to think or absorb something a child has said, I tend to blink alot.)

Me: Boy A, will you please return that book to the classroom library so that Boy B can check it out?
Boy A: But I need it.
Me: But aren't you reading that book for your book club?
Boy A: Yes.
Me: (blink) So where's the copy I gave you for your book club job? (I am frightened that he lost it, because he loses EVERYTHING.)
Boy A: It is in my desk.
Me: (blink, blink) Then why do you need the one from the library?
Boy A: Because I want to read it for fun, and you said I coudn't read ahead for my book club book.
Me: (blink, blink, blink, blink) Just give that one to Boy B, and sit down, please.

4 Days

In four days I am on vacation for two whole weeks. I have big plans for that vacation. Big sleeping. Big reading. Big lying around. Big gardening. Ahhh.

Useless quiz

At least I am some kind of brain! :)

His Dark Materials

I just finished reading a series by Philip Pullman, called His Dark Materials. I found it to be very though provoking and deep. (I am actually enjoying quite a few of these books that Scholastic sent me for my classroom library!) Over at A Small Victory, I found a link to this discussion between the author and the Archbishop of Canterbury. Interesting stuff.

Martyrdom

I hate it when I am getting a good rant on, only to realize that I don't really have a leg to stand on since I have done nothing to solve the problem. When something is irritating, but not quite irritating enough to be worth the fight I know will occur if I bring it up, I often let it go. Then I find, as I am going about my business, that the gremlins in the back of my head are still picking at the irritation, making it swell and ooze bitter juices. That is when I start drafting my rant, planning my attack , rehearsing my soapbox speech.

And then I suddenly realize that the whole problem is due to my own lack of communication or action, so any tirade I start will be turned back on me with no hope of defending myself. So I lance the boil in my brain, chase off the gremlins and take a hot shower, all the while biting my tongue so that I won't sabotage my own good intentions with an off-hand remark.

Someday, I will learn to let it go the first time and save myself the trouble of all this self-martyrdom.

:(

The trouble with reward systems is that they only work if the person desires the reward more than the pleasure of whatever the reward is supposed to replacing. Sometimes, it becomes easier for the person to say "I don't need the reward that badly" and use the whole system as a justification rather than a motivation. In which case, the whole system needs to be overhauled to find a reward that is more desirable than the original behavior. However, when the behavior is truly pleasurable and the consequences not all that bad, it can be hard to find a reward motivating enough.

Or something like that.

Visitors

My father is on his way here as I type. All this week he is going to be travelling this way and that, winding his way to my doorstep. He's due to arrive on Thursday or Friday, and I am quite excited at the thought. Now I just have to get things cleaned up around here, make room for the dining table and buffet he is bringing, and plan some fun things to do.

Heading Out

We are going out to...

*look at a washing machine,
(new washer to be delivered Monday)
*buy copy paper,
(got a whole ream because there was a great sale)
*get my ring fixed (the stone fell out and Huzzah nearly ate it!),
(dropped off, pick up next week)
*shop for groceries,
(mmm...rosemary bread!)
*get Mikey a new paper cutter,
(and a new blade, too!)
*buy wood glue,
(now I just have to glue that door)
*talk to Home Depot about our backyard,
(oops...I'll do this next week while I'm on break) and
*quite possibly have lunch somewhere.
(Claim Jumper has the nicest, most accomodating waitstaff!)

Adios!

Regarding "Flexitarianism"

Mikey mentioned this last night, but before I could write up a rant, I came across one already written. Thanks for saving me the time, Kara.

Read her thoughts (and mine) here.

Before I am going to respect you for your superior ethics, you have to be able to follow through on them.

"Parenting is a Full Time Job" or "Why I am Remaining Childless"

My cousin's mention of this article (boy waves knife at parents after they turn off video game) inspired me to write the following...

I have to take issue with your post regarding video games. (Just for the sake of discussion, not as an argument!) The story that you linked to, and many others like it, are often used as argument against video games. And as much as I hold game designers (my husband included) responsible for the quality and content of their games, it ultimately comes down to the parents (or other family members intrigal in the raising of children) and their ability to monitor what their children are playing.

Parents need to be aware of the content of everything (not just games) that their children are exposed to. They need to discuss things like violence, sex, emotions, world events, and cultural differences as they are introduced. I think rather than sheilding and isolating our children from the dangerous or inappropriate things in life, we need to educate them. Teach a child through your words and actions that something is wrong and they will grow up able to recognize and avoid that thing.

A child who is taught right from wrong, given appropriate boundries and allowed to explore with the guidance of trustworthy adults, WILL NOT attack someone with a knife for turning off a video game. The stories we hear that point to video games (or any other form of entertainment, for that matter) as the culprit are turning a blind eye to the neglect and lack of supervision that most children are growing up with. If kids are imitating games, it is because they have nothing and no one else to imitate.

Of course, that is my own personal opinion. Thanks for letting me share it. :)

Parenting is, in fact, a full time job. It has the highest standards, the most responsibility and the least pay of all jobs out there. It is not for the faint of heart. When you take on the role of parent you are required to act (at least in part) like the grown-up. I know that I am making a lot of demands of parents tonight, but frankly - that's what you sign up for when you accept the position.

Gggrrrr

This week I have had several heart-to-heart conversations with my class.

First, there was the "I am a teacher so I can help you learn, not so I can give you the answers" speech. This one is brought on by the way students raise their hands immediately upon getting an assignment, saying "I don't get it" and refusing to even make an effort unless I am hand-holding them the whole time.

Then, there was the "You have to choose NOW" speech. In this one, I pointed out that people who try hard and learn end up as successful members of society, and people who don't care about their education end up living in prison. I asked them to think about what they wanted to be and make a decision.

During social studies yesterday, they required the "I'm GIVING you the answers" speech, as I realized that most of them still didn't have the answers on their papers after 20 minutes of independent work, a class discussion and me writing the answers on the overhead for them to see.

Today, it was the "If you are going to act like 1st graders, I will have to treat you like 1st graders" tirade (by this point, I am beyond the simple speech). This was as I was telling them about the card system we will be starting on Monday, because the classroom behavior has been so unacceptable lately.

It is one thing to deal with a behavior issue. A child who hits others or forgets his homework or needs a little extra TLC. But when you compound those issues with a complete lack of motivation, it just grinds you down. There are only so many ways you can attempt to interest a child. I have tried EVERYTHING.
homework - it goes home and never comes back
independent work - they sit without working unless I am standing right next to them
small group work - they fight or gossip and get nothing done unless I am standing right next to them
large group work - they play with anything they find in their desks or stare off into space unless I am speaking directly to them
artistic work - they scribble it in as fast as they can
active/physical work - they quickly lose control, screaming and flailing about
musical work - they scream, squeal, squawk or insert inappropriate words
large projects - they turn in half completed projects done with minimal effort and often completely wrong
small projects - they ignore the directions, waste their class time and turn in sloppy, incomplete work

The only thing that seems to work at all...
one-on-one work with me - they perform fabulously, completing things quickly and quietly.

I CANNOT provide constant one-on-one time for 26 students. I just can't. I CANNOT create a desire to learn where there is none. I can nurture and encourage a sagging self-esteem, and I can provide positive feedback for the desired behaviors, but if the student just doesn't care, there isn't much I can do. Especially, if there is no one at home who cares either. So I am driven to send this plea out to parents - all parents, everywhere:

PLEASE show your children how important education is by asking about what they are learning, really looking at their graded work, praising them for making and effort and following through when they aren't. Talk with their teacher on a regular basis. Check their homework nightly. Let them know that they are REQUIRED to perform to the best of their ability (note I am not saying they must get As or Bs or 100%) at all times. Because your children are only with their teacher for part of the day and no matter how strongly we feel about education (and you know we do!), children most often imitate the responses of their family members. Motivation starts at home!!

Rotting my Brain

I have discovered a new favorite show. Wonderfalls is amusing, thoughtful, witty and romantic. Everything I like my fiction to be. It made me laugh out loud several times. Of course, the fact that I like it is a kiss of death. I must have very odd taste in entertainment, because most of my favorites get cancelled long before their time. (Except Angel, which has unfortunately jumped WAY past the shark.) If you happen to be sitting in front of the Boob Toob when it is on, you should give it a watch. Wonderfalls, not Angel.

"You're spiteful in a way that the definition of spiteful doesn't quite prepare you for."

Spam Poetry

I heard an article on NPR the other day about spam poetry and decided that I would give it a shot. What do you think? For months, my inbox has been a poet and I didn't even know it.

safari carolina
hazelnut inset
eclat freudian amphibian pompous brisk
memory quest berra
atrocious hellfire custer
decide authoritative antagonist
ascendant narcosis
plastic anneal gauleiter incidental chasm
avow make erode
longhand pasteup alabaster

How many days until Spring Break?

Before morning recess one of my girls had hawked a loogie on the face of one of my boys. It was dripping down his cheek when I turned to see what was going on. It went downhill from there.

Soylent Green?

When former cattle rancher Howard Lyman appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show in 1996 to share his insider view of the danger of Mad Cow Disease spreading to this country, his revelations about the beef industry prompted a group of Texas cattlemen to file a lawsuit charging Lyman and the talk show host with "food disparagement".
from a description of Mad Cowboy: Plain Truth from the Cattle Rancher Who Won't Eat Meat by Howard Lyman

Becuase you might hurt the poor food's feelings. After all...food is people, too! Oops. I have said too much.

Switches

Recently someone in charge decided that Temecula had had enough of the rainy, spring weather and flipped the seasonal dial to "SUMMER". We have noticed the change, especially at night when we are once again able to sleep with the window open. The plants have noticed, popping into full bloom seemingly overnight. The kitties have noticed, enjoying their daily outing with Daddy during their lunchtime. And my students have noticed, changing from calm, quiet, cooperative children, into squirmy, squirrelly, smelly monsters. As much as I love summer and all it brings with it, I would give large amounts of money to have that dial turned back for about a month. I still have 3 months to go before I can release this particular herd of children back into the wild and I don't know if I can survive with this level of spring fever going full blast for that long. Wish me luck!

50%

Happy Birthday to my Dad, who is celebrating 1/2 a century on this year's St. Urho's day. Congrats. May you have many, many more. Love you.

Death Becomes Her

So I took the death test and found out that I am scheduled to die on November 20, 2050 (at the age of 72). From either cancer (49% chance), Alien Abduction (13%), Homicide (7%), or Contagious Disease (6%).

Figures I couldn't be one of the hundreds (dare I say thousands?) of alien abductions that result in me being alive and crazy. I have to meet the psycho Stephen King aliens. Hmph.

I am disturbed to find that these results don't match up with my previous results, although I am happy to note that I seem to have gained about 30 years. Yay, me! Must be all the exercise I have been doing lately. Oh, right. I haven't been exercising. I must just be lucky.

Other People's Underwear

I finally broke down and took a trip to the laundromat today. Our washer died a couple weeks ago and we have been putting off getting a new one until we find out the requirements for this special rebate that our water company gives and so I had to load everything into the CRV and head to the 'mat filled with people that I am sure were very nice, but who give me the willies anyway because they are seeing my underwear and make me feel guilty because I know better than to leave the jar of quarters just sitting around, but I feel bad that I trust my fellow humans so little. (okay...take a breath!) I was lucky enough to get 2 big washers and 2 little ones just as I got there. I was also lucky enough to get 4 dryers just when I needed them. I KNOW that I could have brought the wet clothes back to dry at my house, but I figured that it was worth $4 to me not to have to drag around wet, heavy clothes. Plus our laundry baskets tend to leave brown marks on wet clothes. I think the stain comes off the wicker or something. Anyway - I returned home unscathed and with much of my grading and recording done, but less $12.50 in quarters. I will be glad when we get our new machine.

Mental Housekeeping

The following is induced by my own inner demons and no one but myself is to blame. I am writing simply as an attempt to exorcise said demons. None of this is meant to lay blame or cause injury. How you react to this post is your own choice, but remember that this is where I vent and purge. I have intentionally not written much on this topic, for fear of hurting others, but I find that instead of fading away, my feelings are deepening and festering in the dark recesses of my mind. By dragging them out into the light, I hope to banish them forever, not spread them around. Thank you for you understanding in this matter.

It is funny, in that sad, ironic kind of way, how easy it is for a word, a phrase, a fleeting thought, to bring old hurts tumbling down out of the closet in which they have been carefully tucked away. All kinds of insecurities and irrational fears can be fed and nurtured on someone else's careless, carefree moment.

Today I received an email link to a photo album filled with pictures of my (step) dad and his new wife, along with many members of my immediate family. One picture depicted my dad and my three siblings with the caption, "Tyson, Steven, Brooks and Shanta - Steven's Children". Now, I know that there was absolutely no thought of excluding me when this wedding occurred, when this picture was taken, or when this caption was written, but that is exactly what has happened. Without even considering the horrifying moment during which I thought, "I guess those ARE his children.", I see this picture of life going on without me - without even the slightest mention of me - and I realize that my family members are becoming strangers to me.

This is not the first time this has occurred. When my mother and her new husband were married, I wasn’t able to be there, either. Things came up, plans changed and I was unintentionally uninvited from the party. Everyone else was in the pictures, eating the food, celebrating the moment, and I was thousands of miles away.

In both instances, important people in my life took a step without me that I couldn't imagine taking without them. When I was married, I had to have these people around me. I would have rescheduled, rearranged, and rethought my plans to have them there. It wouldn't have been right without them. And frankly, it doesn't feel right - or real - that they both were able to do it without me.

So, I look at these pictures of moments that happened without me. I think about how long it has been since anyone has come to visit. I struggle to think of a way I can afford - mentally, physically, monetarily - to make my way there often enough to keep from becoming a non-entity in my own family. And tears well up in my eyes as my throat begins to tighten. Because this isn't how I thought it would be.

New Pictures

I have put up new pictures in several of the categories on my pics page. Now would be a great time to go see them. Enjoy.

Friday Five

It has been a LONG time since I've done this...

1. What was the last song you heard?
Something from Gravity Kills. This is a group that Mikey introduced me to, and although most of it is just background music to me (you know, the kind that you don't pay any attention to), there are a few songs that I recognize and enjoy.

2. What were the last two movies you saw?
Whale Rider - a totally awesome movie about the past, the present and the future all coming to a head for the Maori of New Zealand. I had never heard of it before the day I watched it and I was enchanted by it!

and...I have no idea! We watch mostly DVDs of Firefly and 24 these days. I can't remember the last actual movie I rented.

3. What were the last three things you purchased?
Lunch at Godfather's Pizza (nothing special)
Groceries at Albertson's (hooray! the strike has ended!)
Gasoline (for $2.249/gallon)

4. What four things do you need to do this weekend?
Set up a IRA in my name for tax purposes
Watch a tape for my Crosscultural Language Acquisition and Development (CLAD) class
Research a new washing machine
Take the laundry to the laundromat

5. Who are the last five people you talked to?
a real estate agent
the checkout lady
the girl bagging the groceries
some kid who wanted to sell me the paper
Mikey

Most Recent Sign

Our sprinkler system doesn't work. There are parts of the lawn that get no water whatsoever. There are other parts that get way too much. It is physically impossible to set the timer in a way to get all parts of the lawn watered appropriately. We need to get a lawn service to come and fix it. We have been talking about it for a long time. Today I noticed that the timer wasn't on at all. There is power going to it, but nothing is working. I guess we have put off the inevitable for long enough. Because in Temecula, in the summer, nothing survives long without the sprinkler system.

Actually, with the state of my lawn these days, it might be a good idea to let it all die and then re-sod! Not really, but almost.

Vegetarian Fun Fact #14

The buffet at Godfather's Pizza has exactly ONE kind of pizza that contains no meat. Even the salad pizza has ground beef on it. Hmph.

Update: The salad pizza is actually a taco pizza. I guess the ground beef makes sense in that case. Fine. I still can't eat it.

Options

We are really focused on trying to find a way to buy some land these days. However, with the lack of factual information and the overwhelming number of possibilities that have presented themselves, I am starting to feel out of my league. This is always the worst part of making a decision - the fact finding time. There are just too many questions and not enough answers (at least not enough satisfactory ones that make sense).

Is is better to buy land or fix up our current house? Land prices are skyrocketing, but we can't sell this property the way it is. Is is better to refinance for lower payments or for cash? Lower payments will allow us to save faster, but cash would allow us to buy the land outright. Should we think about selling our house and look for land with a house? Or get a manufactured home for the land? Or just stay put in the house we have now? Should we get a fixed mortgage or an adjustable one? Is 5 acres worth it? Or should we stay put until we can afford more than 5?

Eventually, I will have enough information that I will feel comfortable just making the leap when the opportunity presents itself. But for now I just feel ignorant.

Yikes

I don't know what I did, but something really ticked off my insides. Not in a "I'm sicker than a dog" kinda way. Just in a "I can't trust my tummy at any given moment" kinda way. It is not good when your guts get upset with the rest of you. They have a habit of taking the whole ship hostage when their angry.

Random quotes from Firefly

"Anything in there, Jane?"
"Unless this crate is made of magical wish-granting planks, no."


"Aaaagh! Captain, your dead army buddy is on the bridge."


"When you can't run, you crawl. When you can't crawl, you find someone to carry you."


"Burn the land and boil the sea
But you can't take the sky from me...
Since I've found Serenity"

That last one is paraphrased because I don't like the way it really goes. I am going to engrave that on a plaque and have it at the entrance of my home when I find the place I am going to settle. Don't let me forget it. :)

Book Day

Tomorrow my class is having a book theme day. Recently, they have finished reading books in groups, doing various jobs as they read. All week they have been putting together the presentations they are going to share with the class. I am going to video tape them and we are spending the rest of the day reading - together and alone. They are very excited because I told them to bring books and stuffed animals and pillows and such so we can get comfy while we read. I think I am more excited than they are. And in the middle of the day we are pausing our reading so we can go out and join the Jog-A-Thon. A more perfect day, I cannot imagine!

Thousands of Words

I am NOT a photographer. I like taking picture of things that I want to remember...but I am not good at it. My composition and lighting and who knows what else is all wrong. My photos are simply to job the memory, now awe the eyes.

These photos are a different story.

I Heart Jon Stewart

Conversation on the Daily Show between host, Jon Stewart, and guest, Ed Gillespie, regarding the upcoming presidential elections...

Stewart: So this is going to be tougher than you thought?
Gillespie: Yes. It is looking like it will be more like 1984 or 2000.
Stewart (with his trademark innocence and irony combination): It IS starting to look a lot like "1984".
Gillespie (slowly getting it): Yeah...um...oh.
Hee hee...

Actually, Gillespie seemed like a decent guy. For a leader of the Republican National Committee.

Eatloaf

Mikey decided to make our viggie burger mix into a loaf instead of patties. We slathered ketchup all over it and I am going to go enjoy it right now. :) Whatta man I have.

What the...?

Bush's Education Secretary is already on my crap list because of his part in the No Child Left Behind Act. Anyone who thinks that the best way to support teachers is to cut their budget and show them that you don't trust them by mandating even MORE testing, is not working off the same education model I am (to say the very least). However, when that person then compares the National Teacher's Association to "a terrorist organization", even in jest, things have gone past bad and right into insane.

If Secretary Paige would like to come walk a mile in my shoes, I would be more than willing to let him see exactly what kind of organization I work for. On second thought - I wouldn't let him walk in my shoes. Not only do I not trust him with my students - MY KIDS - but I don't think he's up for the job. To be a teacher, you have to think before you speak. All I can say is that Bush better distance himself from this guy in a BIG way because he does not want to be part of this insult on the teachers of America. We may put up with a lot of crap in the name of protecting and supporting our kids, but we aren't stupid and we don't appreciate being treated like the enemy. We are the backbone of this country and it is about time that Bush and his posse start giving us some props.

Hummermoth

While on my walk (trying to blow off steam induced by previous posts), we saw the wierdest creature. It was flitting from flower to flower like a hummerbird. It had a hummerbird shaped body and was about the right size. However, it had antennae and flat, wide wings like a moth. He never sat still long enough for us to see what it really was, but it was strange no matter what.

Zero Tolerance

Lesson learned by middle schooler friend of mine today:

Saying "I could just kill you" to someone really will get you suspended from school.

Lesson learned by Soleil today:

There are adults who would deal with this by telling said middle schooler that she "should have just punched them, because it would have only been detention".

Warning: Irrational Rant Ahead

(rant)

In the public school setting there are the regular support people - librarians, nurses, custodians - and then there the extra support people - Special Ed teachers and specialists. No matter what kind of support person you are, it is only a title if you don't actually follow it up with action. If you do your job in a half-*&#ed kind of way and rely on the classroom teacher to either do your work or suffer the consequences (because WE are the ones on the line if things don't get done right) then you are NOT, in fact, being very supportive. And when you choose to be less than supportive at a time when the classroom teacher has TONS of paperwork to do (ie: report card time) you are not just being unsupportive, you are making serious enemies.

(/rant)

Still not bragging

My house is clean, my yard is worked, my dishes are done, and my garbage is taken out. Now I am going to the pool!

Think

Mikey shared in interesting and insightful discussion with me the other day. I thought the original post was good, but the comments below are what I found particularly interesting. Anyway - just some fodder for your brain on this quiet Sunday morning.

Livin' Easy

I am going out to mow my lawn wearing a tank top and shorts. Not to brag or anything...

:)

Sleepy Dreamer

I rarely have nightmares and when I do, they are always brought on my something in real life. Last night I had a doozy. You see, I have two re-occuring themes when it comes to nightmares. First, is the dream where I can't open my eyes. I am being chased or have a delicate job to do and a bright light is shining directly into my face and preventing me from seeing anything. Second, is the dream where I realize that one of my teeth is loose just seconds before it falls out, quickly followed by all the rest.

Last night was one of those nights. I dreamt that someone had kicked me in the mouth, loosening my lower front tooth. I ran around the house holding it in place and demanding that someone get me a glass of milk. I swished to no avail. Shortly after my front tooth fell out, I began losing my molars. But not the whole thing. Just the top halves of each, so there were jagged, pointy edges left in my mouth. It was a decidedly unpleasant experience and after I woke up, I spent several minutes running my tongue along my teeth, making sure they were all there and intact.

Yawn

Spent the morning doing our taxes and the afternoon driving around looking for property. Glad the former is done and have plenty to say about the latter, but I am BEYOND tired. I need a nap, pronto!

Isha is Lonely

I have been wishing more and more that I could have another guitar. Isha is a beautiful, nylon-stringed, classical guitar, but I have a yearning for a sleek, steel-stringed guitar with a slender neck and a vibrant tone. My parents always played Martins and yesterday I got to play a friend's Martin for a moment. I wish, I wish...

Then I would be Rambling with Isha and Fate.

Death and Taxes

Today is the day we find out how much money we owe the government. Blech.

The worst part is that in looking over our finances, we have learned that Mikey made 50% MORE than I did. He works hard and I don't begrudge him anything that he has earned, but he is an independent gamer who does next to no advertising and releases a game roughly once a year. Why am I - a teacher of children, a molder of the future - making only 2/3 of what this game designer is making??? Am I just crazy? Or is it the whole freakin' world that has gone insane?

Enough complaining. The fact that Mikey makes as much as he does, allows me to continue doing what I want - no, NEED - to do, despite the fact that it pays next to nothing. And the benefits that I get through my work allow Mikey to continue doing what he needs to do. It all works out in the end.

Good Grief

$450,000 for 20 acres of land.

$275,000 for 1,192 sq. ft. of house.

If I were to sell my house and move to...heck, just about anywhere...I would be rich!

And Counting

One full week of having nothing but fourth graders in my room has passed. One week of getting home by 5:30 (almost) and having time to relax at night. One week of sleeping like the dead.

I realized this morning that I have returned to my normal jumping out of bed, ready to go to work self. Very nice.

Somebody's Got to Do It

I am on the search and rescue team for my school site. We are having a full blown disaster drill on Tuesday - complete with students pretending to be hurt and parents trying to sneak in to get their kids. This is my very first official disaster drill and I am terrified. I am glad that I am getting the chance to practice what I would be doing, because right now, I don't have the slightest clue how it would go down. No - that isn't true. I have an idea, because we have walked through it a couple of times, but I have never done the actual physical thing. I know that it is just a drill, but my adrenaline starts pumping at the thought anyway. I just hope that if something were to really happen (knock on wood) that I would be able to do the job. Search and rescue isn't the nicest job (not that there is a NICE job when it comes to disaster recovery), but I know it will be one that will make me feel as though I am doing something helpful. And somebody's got to do it.

Lesson Learned

All the self help gurus suggest that you set goals that are within your reach (or at least just outside) so you have some chance of reaching them. When I said that I would be home EVERY NIGHT before 5:30, I wasn't thinking about that. Today was the first night since the split that I didn't make it home on time. Although I am disappointed that I didn't even make it a week, I must say there are good reasons for the failure. First, I never should have started this goal during a report card week. There is so much paperwork and computer time that goes into report card week that it just isn't possible to get out early every day. I am impressed that I have managed it as long as I have. Second, they hit me with a surprise deadline a couple of days ago, resulting in some very urgent work this afternoon. There was no putting it off. If I had known earlier, I would have budgetted my time differently, but it doesn't really matter now. Finally, I had homework club this afternoon (an hour long homework session I host each week) and I should have cancelled it. We didn't have much homework this week due to the end of the trimester and I ended up just babysitting them for an hour when I could have been working.

Anyway - that is all past. I am caught up with what I need to do. I am set to do report cards this weekend and get them all done and ready for Wednesday. I can go back to my 5:30 arrival at home again tomorrow. Sigh. I do wish I could have at least made it a week, though.

What is Peace?

Mikey's uncle sent this to me and I just had to share it. It takes awhile to get to the end, but I thought it ws very nice. I think I will have to share it will my class. Anyway - click here to see "What is Peace?".

We will fight for Bovine Freedom!

Hee hee...a gift to you from the wackiest side of my family:

Cows with Guns by Dana Lyons

Be patient - it takes awhile to load. It's worth it.

Thanks to Amy and Amber for sharing.

Participation Positives

It has been awhile since I have participated in this particular meme, and it really isn't the right day (Monday), but I figure I should share some of the positives I have been experiencing. Especially after the complaining I did for so long...

I am thankful:
*for the time to not only tell my student that he knows what he is doing, but to wait around and gloat when he finds out he really does,
*for the energy to make social studies come alive,
*for the patience to listen to girls tell EVERY SINGLE DETAIL of their entire 45 minute lunch period as they explain why they aren't speaking to each other,
*for the space to set my room up in a way that is pleasing to the eye, comfortable for the students and managable for me,
*that I have a bounce in my step and a sparkle in my eye that has been missing for some time,
*for the ability to stick to my new goal of being home by 5:30 every night,
*for the support of my friends and family,
*about turning the tables and being the one to give support for awhile,
*for the hail pounding down on the ground just as I am talking about how weather can contribute to erosion of rocks,
*that I allowed the students to get up and look out the windows to see the hail, suspecting that they were going to really appreciate it, and turned out to be right,
*to see my class happily working out fraction problems cooperatively with partners,
*and as always - for my Mikey, who helps make every good thing seem great.

What are YOU thankful for? Leave me a comment or link.