Conspiracy

I know this post won't contain any big surprises for those of you who have dealth with medical insurance companies on any kind of regular basis...but I don't...so it's news to me.

I have discovered the conspiracy that keeps our medical system going. It's like this. I go to the doctor for a routine exam, something that will hopefully prevent me from having problems in the future AND which is covered by my insurance. I pay my ever rising co-pay like a good girl and go on my merry way, happy that the test results were all as expected, glad that it is over until the next year.

Not so.

First, I get the notice from the lab saying that I am past due on my account. Hmm. I call the insurance company to verify that the tests were, in fact, covered. Yep. So, I call the lab to tell them so. They haven't received payment. I call the insurance company back and tell them this (because it is apparently MY job to make these calls and handle the billing/payment for these companies), to which they reply that they have not received a bill from said lab. Okay. I can see the problem and an easy solution. I call the lab, AGAIN, and inform them that the bill wasn't received. They agree to send another bill to the insurance company. I get to hang up feeling as though I have accomplished something and go on with my day.

(I know. This is where all of you who are experienced in this sort of thing get a good laugh. You're welcome. They say laughter is the best medicine. I hope so because actual medicine is too damn expensive and frustrating to deal with.)

Two months later, I open a letter from the lab. It says basically the same things, only this time there is more red highlighting. They are helping me out by making the important words like "$60.00" and "past due" easier to spot. I go through the same rigamorole that I did the last time. Multiple phone calls later we have once again determined that my tests were covered by the insurance, that the bill wasn't received and so it wasn't paid. I am again told that the lab would send out the bill. This time I hang up warily only after writing down names and confirmation numbers and all kinds of important information. (See, I am a quick learner!)

Repeat this procedure every other month until this week. This time the letter has the words "FINAL NOTICE" in a big red box. It contains threatening language about collection agencies and adversely affected credit. I am left with two choices - continue to fight this losing battle or just pay the damn bill. I pay $90 a month (I know, that isn't much compared to some, but it is a lot for us) to these insurance company incompetents. I paid my co-pay when I went to the doctor. For the last year I have spend valuable time dealing with these two companies that refuse to talk to each other. And I am STILL going to end up paying for something for which I shouldn't be responsible. The clinic gets their money. The insurance company gets theirs. And I get screwed.

Dammit.