Is It Too Late To Quit?

I was supposed to have blood drawn today. It didn't happen. I was unable to jump through all the hoops and wade through all the BS before the 12 o'clock deadline. You see, at noon, the Vampire Lady goes out for her lunch and doesn't return until AFTER the FedEx pickup time. This was all carefully planned so as to make my life as miserable as possible.

I headed over to the VL's den this morning, a little bit angry because I knew she was going to make me do the shipping myself, but resigned to doing it because of how royally she had screwed up the last time. Since she already knew that I was going to be pissy about paying her the extra $10 to ship and handle when I was going to be doing that part myself, she decided to call someone to find out how to deal with it. Hmm. It turns out that she CAN'T give me the blood and tell me to ship it myself. Which makes perfect sense and was the problem I had with the whole thing in the first place. Anyway, she told me that in order for her to ship it for me, I had to have a special bag for her to put it in. Again, makes perfect sense. My only question is if she runs a medical laboratory how can she NOT HAVE THIS KIND OF BAG?????? I left the lab (having been told that I would need to be back by noon) feeling irritated. I called Mikey, vented, and headed over to a FedEx shipping location that he knew of.

So, I got to the Postal Annex only to be told (by a very sympathetic girl, by the way) that they didn't have this kind of bag either and that I would probably have to drive to the other side of town where there is a FedEx hub. I knew where this hub was because of the last time when I had to personally take my blood there and pay $30 to get it to Mayo after the VL screwed up. By this stage, I was frustrated, tired and not a little sore. I again called Mikey, who suggested that I return home and let him help me - something I was only too happy to do, since I was on the verge of tears.

At home, we decide that maybe we should try for a different lab, having absolutely no faith in the current one. I called around and learned two things. One, I am an idiot. And, two, labs don't do this kind of thing. Three calls later, I have been insulted, annoyed, and told that what I am asking is impossible by three different labs. You would think that noone ever had to have blood shipped to the Mayo - only one of the biggest hospitals in the country. No wonder the hotel industry is doing so well there. Apparently ANYONE who has to have blood work sent there travels there to do it. This was my breaking point. After several teary breakdowns and a string of curse-words later, I gave up and went back to Plan A - finding the materials needed to get the VL to ship my blood for me.

Not wanting to make a special trip all the way across town (might not sound like much to you, but traffic here sucks and I feel like crap at this point) only to find that they didn't have what I needed, I decided to call the FedEx hub first. A very clever plan, if I must say so myself, except for one thing - I couldn't find the number ANYWHERE. Not the yellow pages, not the white pages, not the internet, nowhere. I finally ended up calling FedEx customer service where a WONDERFUL woman listened to my frantic story and explained the whole process to me clearly and calmly. When I thanked her profusely for being the one ray of hope in my whole frustrating day, she even offered to call ahead and make sure that they would have what I needed. *Sigh* She probably thought I was crazy, given the emphasis with which I thanked her. I was ready to burst into tears again - this time from sheer relief.

Darling Mikey packed me into the car and drove me to the hub, where he carefully protected me from more frustration and the attendant from me. We not only managed to get everything we needed (a diagnostic bag and a FedEx Express form), but only sent the box containing Christmas gifts off to my dad and his wife. When we got back to the car it was exactly 12 o'clock, and since I am not yet proficient at Apparating, we had to give up for the day. Which is just as well because I was in no mood to face the Vampire Lady again.

Tomorrow, I will go first thing in the morning and get this over with. At least until next month. Which reminds me - I didn't pick up any extra bags or forms. Dang it all!